The majority of people look forward to the holiday season. Many view Thanksgiving as a time to get together with family and friends they may not see too often and eat foods that typically only come around once a year. Sounds great, right? While this is a time to celebrate and indulge, for people who struggle with eating disorders, this time comes as one that is intimidating, scary, and very overwhelming.
America has greatly emphasized Thanksgiving as a time to “loosen your belt” and eat until you’re stuffed with the foods you love and appreciate during this holiday season. Most people can view it as a time to do just that, while others struggle to find balance and forgiveness around eating more than usual. Eating disorders create feelings of shame and guilt when presented with different foods or portion sizes as well as new dishes and foods that are typically viewed as “unhealthy.” For people struggling, this day revolves around the one thing they fear the most, and they feel as though they may lack control over the food itself.
Another challenge is the social pressure or expectation that one may feel to eat “normally” or try new dishes. With the day revolving heavily around food, additional comments can be made not only about the food itself but also about body image and eating habits. Whether these comments are direct or indirect, they can be very triggering for someone struggling with an eating disorder.
Breaking routine is also tough when it comes to eating disorders. Usually, someone will have strict guidelines and rules about eating that they follow daily. That may include eating at certain times, with certain people, or primarily alone, in a safe environment, and preparing the food themselves. Traveling to family gatherings throws a wrench in all of this and those that are struggling may find it hard to cope.
For some who are further along in their recovery journey, Thanksgiving can disrupt or challenge their progress by putting them in a situation they may not feel ready for. Others may have unrealistic expectations of them to be better or cured of the disorder. They may have a solid meal plan and treatment team that they have been making progress with and this day may not meet these requirements, therefore making it harder and leaving them seeking comfort from past eating disorder behaviors.
If you are struggling with an eating disorder this holiday season, finding ways to cope may be challenging. Try to give yourself grace and seek help from your support system. If you have a therapist or coach, reach out if you feel overwhelmed. Practice mindfulness activities and keep your coping skills handy. Try to be prepared for meal times. If you have a meal plan, it may be recommended that you try and stick to that with the food that is offered. If you are practicing more flexibility around food, try and talk with your team to come up with realistic goals surrounding meal time.
If you are supporting someone with an eating disorder, remember that they may require more support at this time. Check in with them before the day and discuss what some signs of struggle may be and how you can help. Try and avoid comments surrounding food, body image, calories, etc. Also, try to enjoy yourself and set an example for them that models freedom, happiness, and neutrality around food. Showing them that it is ok to not be rigid all the time and that you are allowed to enjoy different foods without judgment can provide them with the reassurance they need.
While Thanksgiving may be a challenge for some, it can also be a time to reflect and be thankful for all that has come about in the last year as well as look forward and set goals for the next. Be grateful for where you are on your journey and thank yourself and your support system for how far you have come.
~Taylor Greibe, Eating Disorder Recovery Coach
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